Picture the scene; You're stood in line at the airport waiting to check-in for your flight. It's tediously slow moving and long, but you know the line for security will be even longer. You're hoping for a free upgrade, but preparing yourself for the reality that you'll be crammed into a seat with just enough leg room for a person shorter than you.
A few minutes later you join the gargantuan tail back that is the line to get through the security which, like everyone else, you know is merely the illusion of security. The security staff snap and snarl like a pack of hungry wild animals looking for a weak victim among the herd of travelers you have joined. It's a monotonous farcical pantomime.
When you board the plane you wonder how the person squeezing down the isle in front of you managed to get that huge bag on the plane when you were told at check-in that your backpack would have to be checked luggage as it was too big for the cabin despite the fact you have flown with it many times before.
The man sitting next to you has an ass so large that his thigh is caressing you gently as you read a tatty old copy of SkyMall found in the seat pocket in front of you. You leaf through that pages and yet again wonder to yourself 'who buys this shit?
--- Article Notes ---
Time of death : 00:16 (June 13th)
After starting this article on a plane I stopped writing it because I struck up a conversation with someone next to me (and no, it wasn't the fictional fat ass man). When I returned to it hours later after arriving at a far off destination I reflected upon the fact that as tedious and annoying as air travel can be, it's still pretty incredible and a privilege that I shouldn't be so quick to trash.